you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
