I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Randomize
