i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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