return my video game
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize