pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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