You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize