Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
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