Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
A+ Viking dick
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Drunk is a universal language darling
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