Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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