I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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