Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize