Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
