At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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