I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
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