i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize