It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
