i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
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