his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Randomize
