We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
The best revenge is premature balding
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
