handjob tips. give me some.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
If I die, sorry about rent.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
