Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
