3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
another moral hangover. fuck.
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
