I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Randomize
