haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
