we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
