You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Randomize
