I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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