He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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