I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I just want nice things and good sex
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Randomize