you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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