And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
