why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
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