Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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