I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
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