do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
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