hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
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