I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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