eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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