You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
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