she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize
