My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
You can't just leave with hair like that
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
Randomize
