Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
