we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
