that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
