Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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