you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Randomize
