I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize
