his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Randomize
