oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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