i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize