Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
